As a mum, I’m always (whenever I have a chance/constantly) planting a kiss (peck) on my lil’ one… And I’ll always try to hug her (especially after she wakes up, before I carry her up from the bed (our bed is just the mattress right on the floor)).
So far, I make it a point to hug her after she wakes up (like I mentioned above), and kiss her on the forehead while putting her to sleep (nursing while lying down). I think it’s hugely important to introduce hugs and kisses to her and ‘incorporate’ (I don’t really know what word to use here) it into part of her daily lifestyle… Just because hugs and kisses are a form of “loving touch” I feel. It makes one feel good and loved upon giving/receiving it to/from another party, especially someone you love (who is very close/important to you).
I remember when my gramps (grandpa) passed away in September 2008, I had the thought about regretting why I hadn’t really hugged him before he really left us, and I blamed myself for finding it a little awkward (or ‘funny’) to try and initiate one “out of nowhere”. Until he really left us. (But it probably isn’t the most ‘suitable’ scenario then as he was already ill and hospitalised during the ending stage.) I felt so mad at myself, and I imagined how ‘good’ it would have felt if we simply, just hugged. It could be we were just not used to hugging each other as we had never really did so. It was never really initiated, even though our relationship is pretty close (I would say). And he and grandma probably came from an era (generation) that is not so ‘open’ (in terms of displaying such affection) in that sense. People in the olden days I think tend to be more reserved (shy). But all these, are just EXCUSES. 😦 It was only after he left us (to a better place) that I started hugging my grandma etc. And it became more ‘natural’ once you start (and keep) doing it… It felt good, I believe, for both the giver AND receiver.
I’m sorry, 阿公. I wished I had… (I shan’t go into the many details here…) I know you won’t blame me at all, and you love me (us) lots, no matter what… He has always been a family man who treasures spending time/doing things together as a BIG family (with his son and daughters, and grandchildren). We somehow all the more valued that after he passed away. I must say, it was probably because of him (his departure + his belief), that we all ‘grew’ closer in one way or another, and started appreciating all the inter-family gatherings.
Many a times I will think to myself, “If only he is still around, he’ll be so happy to…”. See his granddaughter (me) get married. Hear the news on my expectancy. Play with his GREAT-granddaughter! He would be, SO, SO thrilled and happy (I believe)! But LIFE, as it is, is cruel in such a way… Sad to say, I can do nothing to change this fact (his departure). I only wish (and keep reminding myself) that he is at a better place, all happy with no worries. And deep down in my heart, I really hope he is watching over us and sharing all the joys we are having, smiling over us.
Okay, enough on my gramps (I miss you so much, I really do)… (Kind of sidetracked a little~ *Just a granddaughter thinking about (missing) her grandpa…)
SO, anyway, back to the original topic, and so I’d like Venice to be growing up in an environment where hugs and kisses are definitely not ‘missing’ (or rare, or even ‘awkward’) from our lives, where it will be integrated in such a way as part of our lifestyle (oh-so-naturally), also a means of our family bond, be it with her Mommy, Daddy, grandma, grandpa and even Chor Chor. (And yes, the above segment on my grandpa does all the more make me want to cultivate it into our lives.)
So far, she is a baby (toddler) that pretty much loves touch. She likes (always wants) to be carried/cuddled, will sayang us (me and Mak Mak (her grandma) especially) by leaning her face against ours, or lying her head on our shoulder/chest, will come and hug us, just letting me hold her in my arms, or resting on me, will come and kiss me by her own self (and recently straight on at my mouth, sticking her tongue out)! *Awwwwwwww~ I LOVE YOU, SWEETIE! She really makes me feel so loved by her at times. 🙂
Here’s a recent pic of her (and yes, it’s a self shot that I attempted because I badly wanted shots of her kissing me but yet the Daddy isn’t one to really take photographs of US (more candid/natural shots depicting our daily lifestyle)) kissing me right on the mouth!
I believe it’s also because so far me (and my mom) has always been kissing her and hugging (sayang-ing) her so now she has also learnt how to do all these… Especially since we do it on such a regular basis (I do it everyday) and I feel pretty heartening that she is so close to me now. Must be all the carrying, cuddling, hugging, kisses and 24/7 time spent together with her. A SUPER PLUS point from being a SAHM. ❤